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What’s at the end of this, Lord?
Crazy things have been happening lately, and I’ve never been so busy in my entire life. Yearbook, School work, Projects, Examinations, Graduation Ball, Communication letters, etc. I don’t know what to prioritize anymore. It’s been a full week of 4 hours of sleep. I have to remind myself repeatedly that I have 20 days left before graduation, so I have to make these days count. I don’t know how, but I’m pretty sure that I’ll still be busy for the next days to come. Anyways, we already passed my confirmation slip in UP-LB last week, so it is (somehow) official that I will be studying there in 5 months time. That’s all, I guess.
This is my first ~fashion~ blog post, but there’s nothing much in here. I don’t even know if you can call this a “fashion blog post”.. well, whatever. I was always into edgy clothes or just the usual stuff before: shirts, pants and sneaks.. then I’m off to go. So this year, I had this ‘minor’ resolution to start clothing myself like a proper girl. It’s been a while now since I had my usual ragged blue pants on and I can’t be proud enough. Hahaha!
For the past few weeks, I’ve been addicted to online shopping and it still feels like nothing won’t stop me. I’ll be showing you guys an item I bought from an online shop on Instagram.. others will be posted soon, promise!
Today, I joined my grandparents run some errands. They are slowly becoming so busy preparing for Canada next month. They’ll stay there for a good year, and it just saddens me. It doesn’t feel like home whenever they are not here. Well, I just hope they’ll enjoy there stay in the country.
What I Wore:
A question I get a lot of times from people, but it has been different nowadays. In bed time, I hear my own tired body trying to get a rightful answer from myself. Is this worth it? Are the sacrifices enough to make your prayers answered? I’m tired of chasing, and I am fully aware that I have no other choice, but to keep fighting and sacrificing because this is my love language to people: Acts of Service. The last thing I want to do is self-pity, so I try so hard to be fine; however, the stress is starting to eat me like a monster. I cannot hold back the tears… I think I pushed myself to the limits. I cannot carry myself anymore. I am tired and can’t keep going like the old times.
My lights, they are slowly getting busted. I do not know how to make them shine like they used to. I just wanna end this all up and proceed to the new season of my life, but I know that that is not how things work in the universe. May I achieve my dreams or vice versa, at least I was still able to run through everything. I was, am and will be capable. On the other hand, a part of me hope: Maybe, I am only in need of life conversations and prayers. This too shall pass.
One thing I will never get tired of loving and missing soon. Until today, I’m grateful of being with the family who loves movie nights , jamming sessions and road trips. Getting into coffee shops in the middle of the night to chill, and maybe talk about life. I can’t wait for college, but that also means less time with the family - which makes it harder. I can’t thank the Universe enough for placing me to this family because I can’t imagine myself growing up, failing and standing up again without these people.
If you’re looking for the word for that means caring about someone beyond all rationality and wanting them to have everything they want no matter how much it destroys you, it’s love. And when you love someone, you don’t stop ever. Even when people roll their eyes or call you crazy. Even then. Especially then. You don’t give up because if I could give up, I could just take the world’s advice and move on and find someone else. That wouldn’t be love. That would be some other disposable thing that is not worth fighting for.
— How I Met Your Mother (Ted)
Themes by The Little Mermaid, Kisty